Truths, Lies, and Somewhere in Between
by Stitched-Song
Summary: Matthew Williams just moved to a new town, and thinks he won't have any friends, but boy is he wrong. He befriends the school's 'bad boy', Alfred F. Jones. However, Alfred has a big secret. They both struggle with feelings, single fathers, and school life. Goth!Canada and Cutter!America. UsCan, yaoi, self harm, human names used, M for language and subject matter.
1. Prologue Alfred: Pain is Welcome

A/N: First of all, I'm really glad I got this out of my head. Seriously, I couldn't do anything without thinking about this. Secondly, I published the first story on my account! I'm sorry if it's bad, but it is the first story. Thirdly, I'd like to thank syrus07, because she encouraged me the post this! Love you, bestie~! Lastly I do not own these characters, and never will...

* * *

"No! I will not go see that stupid chick-flick with you!" I yelled angrily at my father, Arthur. He was trying to get me to go to the movie with him, and see some girly film. That was not going to happen.

"Bloody Hell! It isn't a 'chick-flick'! It's a romantic comedy!"

"Same difference." I retorted with a smirk. His expression turned sad. "I... just wanted to have a fun night with my son..." his expression turned again, angrier. "But, he doesn't care about me does he? No! He doesn't respect me! Why Alfred? We fight over everything! You never did this to your mother!"

He stood there panting as I watched him dumbly. We both had tears streaming down our faces. I was shocked that he had brought up my mother. She had died in a car crash 2 years ago, and he hadn't mentioned her since. He had put away every picture of her and locked up the master bedroom. My father now slept in the guest room, or on the couch if we had company. I heard him whisper something.

"Um, what?" I asked, confused. "Go and make yourself food and stay away from my room. I don't want to see or here you for the rest of the night. Obviously, you don't love me."

I started sobbing as I watched him retreat up the stairs. I wanted to call out to him, say he was wrong, but I couldn't through my sobs. When I finally heard the door slam. I said in a hoarse voice "B-but I do love you!" Nobody was around to hear, though. I went to the kitchen and dried my tears on a paper towel. I took a glance around me. Through the doorframe I could see the living room, where the fight took place. Then I heard a noise at the top of the stairs.

"D-dad?" I said, nervously. "I would have told you to say that your sorry, but you never are." With that, he walked away again. He was right, even more so than he thought. 'How much of my life is a lie?' I asked myself. I realized that the knife drawer was right in front of me. I opened it slowly, and some calm part of my mind informed me that I was shaking. I had started cutting after my mom's death, and stopped only a couple of months ago. Picking up the sharpest knife I could find, I pressed it against the skin of my wrist, slowly adding pressure until blood came out. I sighed at the familiar feeling. "_Much better_."


	2. Chapter 1 Matthew: New School

A/N: Yes, yes I know that I uploaded the prologue like, 6 hours ago, but 47 people have already read it! Thats like a million! You guys don't know how happy you've me. I still don't own Hetalia (sadly), and I thank all the readers!

With love, Stitched

* * *

I sighed loudly while fingering the bottom of my old sweatshirt. Then I shifted in my seat and started picking at my black nail polish. Students coming into the classroom gave me funny looks. _At least they're looking at me _I thought, optimistically. But really, who could blame them? I was wearing all black, exept for a faded red sweatshirt. I started to dress like this so people would notice me, but it didn't work. I grown fond of the color black, even if it made me "invisible" or maybe look like somebody's shadow. I doubted I would make any friends, which is what happened the other three times i'd moved. However, it would be the last. My father finally found a steady job... as a male stripper. That was another reason I thought I would have no friends.

As I was thinking, the teacher called my name, but I didn't hear. She tried again. "Matthew Williams? Can you please come to the front of the room?"

"Oh! Ok, um, sorry!" I walked to the front to stand next to my teacher, Ms Braginskya. She was a Ukrainian woman with a very large, um, chest. On the way I heard whispers of "freak" and "demon" and "psycho". I stopped and smiled at the nearest gossiper- a boy in a miniskirt. _Like he's one to talk._ He seemed taken aback for a second, then smiled an apologetic smile.

When I got to the front of classroom I said "Hello eh, my name is Matthew Williams, I'm 14 years old, I moved here from Canada, and I'm a goth." The whole classroom stared, exept for the miniskirt guy and another boy next to him- I'd soon find out their names were Feliks and Toris, and they were a couple- who acted like it was completly normal. Ms Braginskya cleared her throat.

"Matthew, you will be sitting next to Mr Jones. Alfred please raise your hand."

_Oh great_, I thought, _a jock._ _I'll be punched instead being ignored!_

As I walked to my assigned seat, an overpowering feeling came over me. It was dread.

* * *

A/N: Ok, this took way to long to type up! I think there are to many paragraphs... whatever.


	3. Chapter 2 Alfred: A Drawing

Sorry I haven't updated this in such a long time. I just got over a period of depression, where I would sit on my lazy ass and cry and listen to a hell of a lot of My Chemical Romance ( that did nothing to improve my mood). I haven't been singing, drawing, writing, or doing anything that I enjoy because I overheard my mom and grandma talking about I was going through a "rebellious" stage. No, this is who I always was, but I never had the courage to show it until now. I swear, my grandmother wants a Mary Sue as a granddaughter. Enough of my bitch ranting. Hetalia doesn't belong to me. By the way, this is a really short filler chapter and so is the next one.

-Stitched

* * *

I sat next to Matthew- the goth kid- in first period math class. I was copying notes when I saw Matthew unfold a piece of paper that I noticed being passed down from Antonio- an art student, who was one of my close friends and who was captain of the soccer team. I glanced over to see the slip of paper that the boy was looking at. It was a drawing of Ms. Braginskya. It was actually very good, except one thing was horribly out of proportion. Her breasts. Antonio had drawn them so large that they took up nearly the entire width of the page. I watched as Matthew refolded the paper and stuck it in his pocket. I was glad he did that, because 8th grade boys can be really mean, and Ms. Braginskya had tutored me.

In the beginning of this year, I was struggling with math. That was in September, and now, in January, I was passing with flying colors. Frankly, she was my favorite teacher, and no matter what she looks like, she always will be. When ever I had a problem, I would go to her instead of the guidance counselor. She was really nice, and it goes to show that you can't judge a book by it's color. I had them same feeling about Matthew, and he kind of seemed lonely. I would try and be his friend; he also had something about him that made me curious.


	4. Chapter 3 Matthew: What an Odd Day

At lunch I had sat with Feliks and Toris. They were interesting people, in a sad sort of way. Feliks had been thrown out of his house when his parents had found out he was a cross dresser. Toris had moved out of his house when his parents tried to get him to "pray the gay away" at his local church. They did that when they saw him kiss Feliks. Even though Toris was 14, and Feliks was 13, they lived with Toris's cousins, Ravis and Eduard. It made me greatful that my father didn't care how I dressed, or wouldn't care if I had a preference for guys.

XxX

I heard the last bell ring. _Shit_. I hadn't written anything in Mr. Roma's world history class. I would have to ask Alfred for the homework. He had been in all of my classes, yet I hadn't spoken a word to him other then "hello". I opened my locker, and Alfred opened the one to my left. It's now or never! I told myself in regard to asking him to sum up the entire lesson. However, before I could open my mouth, he noticed me and yelled "Hey, Mattie!" I swear half the school could have heard him call me that ridiculous name. I felt my eye twitch. Alfred quieted down. I hadn't even known he could be so quiet.

"I saw what you did today, and I want to saw that was really great."

He must have been talking about the drawing somebody had passed during math.

"Oh, thanks, I guess." I replied suspiciously. I didn't think that was the only reason he came to talk to me. He seemed a little nervous, too. He rocked back on his heels, rocked forward, and back, over and over.

He cleared his throat. "So, do you want to like, hang out or something? I mean you don't have to if you want to, but I was-"

"Sure." I replied. He seemed to relax. He slung his backpack on one shoulder, and grabbed my hand as I close my own locker. Then he literally dragged me out of the school.


	5. Chapter 4 Alfred: Broken Boys

Oh look, another chapter! This is the chapter where the love and mature content starts. Okay, so the author of one of my favorite stories, lumaluma (that's the author, not the story), thanked me. Ohmygodohmygodohmy- * dies* Guys, I might not be posting as much, because of school and swim team.

-Stitched

* * *

I had a fun time with Mattie so far. Despite him being so quiet, he was actually really nice! We were sitting on a bench at the park, when an idea popped into my head. I ran off, calling over my shoulder.

"Hey Mattie! Follow me!"

I sprinted into the woods near us. I had a special place I went to so I could think. Nobody knew about it. Well, people knew about it, but they were never there with me. The proof was in the carvings on the trees.

I jumped a fallen branch, and skidded to a halt, just in time to avoid running right into the pond on our side of the sunny clearing. A split second later, and I heard footfalls only feet away from me. There was a muffled thump, then I started to tip forward, and Matthew tried to catch me. The result was both of us splashing face first into the water.

Both of our heads went underwater momentarily, then we came up laughing. He was still in a fit of giggles when I looked over at him. With flushed cheeks, sodden clothes, dripping hair, and mascara running down his face like black tears, he somehow looked... beautiful.

I quickly tried to hide my heated face by standing up. He was still sprawled out in the water. I offered him my hand and helped him get up. When he was standing, I squeezed his hand softly.

"Friends?" I asked.

He only stared at our hands. It was a while before he started to speak.

"Al?" I smiled as he started shyly.

"Before we get to close, there are somethings you need to know about me. You might not want to know me after hearing them." he took a deep breath before continuing, "My father works as a male stripper at a gay bar, and my mother died at giving birth to me. Please don't call me a whore, even though I've heard it before. And no, my mother did not wish to die, or have a heart attack when she saw me or anything like that."

I was shocked at this information. Not the stripper-father part, or the dead mother part, I was shocked at what people said about him at his old school. Goddammit- I was in love with this boy. This beautiful, sad, hurt boy. He might be as broken as me, maybe more.

I cupped his cheek with my hand. He had the softest skin you could imagine. "Hey, I would never say that, I promise. If it makes you feel better, my father is an alcoholic, and my mother died in a car accident two years ago." I managed to smile the entire time. It wasn't my 'a hundred watt grin', and the effect was ruined by the fact that I was crying, but I think he stopped telling himself that he was an ugly, horrible creature that didn't deserve to be alive. I knew that feeling all to well; it was the feeling I would get before cutting, the hopelessness and despair of thinking that a knife was my friend.

The boy I loved so unconditionally saw my tears, and wrapped his arms around me. It felt so good to be held by the shorter male, like it was meant to happen. I told myself it was my imagination .

"Come on Alfred, lets get you cleaned up." He let go of me for a moment and the took my hand, guiding me in the general direction of where I guessed his house was. It would have been fun hanging out with him, if not for the chore of hiding my bandaged wrists.


	6. Chapter 5 Matthew: Dasvedanye

**Hey! So I typed this story on the bus to swimming, with Syrus07 sitting next to me (sup peeps). Um... So to the fans of her work, she IS alive and says hi. Btw this is the second longest chappie so far!**

-Stitched

* * *

I walked to the back door of my new house with Alfred behind me. When we reached the porch, I turned to him with as much dignity as I could muster.

"Um, Al? We should...uh... take off our clothes... Because they're all dirty and wet! I mean my dad would throw a fit if we dripped pond water on the carpet..."

I looked away; the sentence didn't turn out right. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught sight of him staring at the ground. My heart swelled suddenly, and I quickly tried to put out that feeling. What I had learned from Feliks and Toris popped back into my head.

~flashback~

Feliks and Toris had just finished the telling me what had happened. The brunette and blonde sat in silence as I processed the information. We were at the back of the cafeteria, sitting alone, eating chicken nuggets that tasted-and bounced- like rubber.

I chewed slowly and thoughtfully. There was nothing wrong with cross dressing or being homosexual. But what happened next left me scarred.

A tall boy sauntered up to our table. The three of us had been sitting alone, so I thought he had come to sit with us. I smiled at him and he smiled back. But something in that smile was off, and it made me feel weird, like his purple eyes could pierce my soul.

He brushed his dirty blonde locks out of his eyes. He then leaned down and whispered in Feliks' ear, which I couldn't hear. He stood up and straightened the long scarf he was wearing.

"Dasvedanye, faggots."

My Polish friend turned quickly and hid his face. But I had already seen that he was crying.

~end of flashback~

I shuffled awkwardly before unzipping my sweatshirt. He mumbled something as I quickly wiggled out of my shirt.

I looked at Alfred, who hadn't taken off a thing, and his face was bright red.

"Hey, Al, are you okay?"

He gasped as I put my hand on his forehead, but I dismissed it. Hot, popular, athletic people do not fall for wimpy wallflowers. Especially if they're the same gender. Especially in a town that it takes courage to admit to yourself that you're gay, let alone to everyone else. It was simply not excepted here.

"Oh, uh, don't worry about me Mattie! I just feel a cold coming on, so I don't want to take anything off!"

I didn't believe him, however I didn't push the matter. I quickly shed my self of my shoes, socks, and pants, until I was shivering in my underwear.

"I'll go get some t-towels, eh? I'll be right back."

My teeth were chattering uncontrollably. I quickly ran inside to get the towels, but I felt like he was watching my every move.

* * *

Dasvedanye - Russian for 'goodbye'


	7. Chapter 6 Alfred: Ugly plus extra

**Hey guys. No funny Author's Note for today. It's kinda sad- today I found out that a kid who used to go to my school tried to commit suicide, but didn't cut deep enough. People HATED him, but I want to get to know him. Sadly, he transferred schools last year. So this story's for him. And yes, I made Ivan a bully, that will be a backstory in one of the three companion fics I'm planning. **

-Stitched

* * *

I stepped into the Matthew's shower, in the bathroom connecting to his room. I could hear him rummaging through his drawers. He had been worried about me, so I lied to him. He would hate me if I told him the truth.

I hissed slightly as the warm water touched the open wound on my arm. I had cut deeper then I had thought.

Blood started to flow again as I scrubbed my arm, and it mixed with the water to create a pinkish liquid on the tile floor. The sight of it made me want to gag. I was a freak who enjoyed mauling himself. It was nasty, but I couldn't help it.

Matthew was pure- his chest was pale like fresh snow. His skin was smooth, unlike mine, which was covered in angry red scars that seem like they would never fade. I had a reason to be ashamed, and if Matt found out, it would be the end of our delicate friendship. I would never be able to whisper sweet nothings in my ear, if I could even manage to refrain from scaring him off. He would never scream my name at the top of his lungs when he-

Wait, what? I realized what I had started thinking about and glanced downward. Thank god I hadn't gotten that far in my fantasies. But really, I had just met him today, and I was already thinking dirty about him? I should be the male stripper, not his father. It would make more sense, considering my actions.

I finally realized that the water raining down on my back had gotten cold. I quickly finished washing myself and grabbed a towel. I frantically started searching for bandages in his medicine cabinet; my old ones had taken residence in his garbage can. I ended up using almost an entire box of band aids, which were going to hurt when I tried to take them off later, but I could handle pain easily.

I quickly dressed in the black clothing he had left me, and surprisingly, it fit. He was only about an inch or two shorter then me, but because of his effeminate figure, he looked shorter. I opened the door, without bothering to knock. Matt stood there, just about to put on some underwear.

I stood there for who knows how long, until I heard him cough. I bolted out of his room, down the stairs, and finally plopped down on the living room couch.

"Alfred Fucking Jones, you are disgusting, you thought he actually looked cute! Why did you think that? You are a pervert!" I mentally screamed at myself.

A few minutes later, Mattie came downstairs and led me back to his room. He did my hair and even put a little make up on me. I have to admit I looked really cool. He took a picture of me with a camera that develops film automatically, and prints it too.

When it was time to go, he gave me a photo, and I promised to talk to him tomorrow. As I walked home I couldn't get the image of the naked Canadian out of my head.

/EXTRA- Lesbian, it's a Teacher's Thing/

I walked into Ms Braginskya's classroom forty five minutes early. My teacher sat at her computer, smiling like an idiot. She looked up at me still smiling.

"What's wrong Alfred? Would you like to talk about something?"

I nodded, knowing my secret was safe with her. I was such a teachers pet.

"Ms Braginskya, it's about Matthew." Her smile faltered slightly. "It's nothing bad, it's just... Well I have a bit of a crush on him. I'm gay. I just needed to tell somebody, so I could get it off my chest. I hope it doesn't bother you."

She blinked. "Alfred, why would it bother me? Come here, I want to show you something."

I walked to stand behind her, and she clicked a slide show application on her computer. There were a couple of photos of random objects, but then there was another photo that came up.

It was a photo of my teacher with another woman. The woman had long, white blonde hair, pulled back with a navy blue headband that matched her eyes. She had a modest build, and was dressed casually. The most striking thing about her though, was the fact that my teacher had her arm around her, and was kissing her.

Said teacher looked up at me and watched my astonishment.

"That's my girlfriend, Natalya. Well, I should say wife, we are getting married in two months!"

I snapped out of my thoughts. "Wow! Congrats! I would totally think it would be cool to meet her, and thank you for showing me, it's a great thing to know this, I'll try to get to know Mattie better!"

I was happy that I wasn't alone in this, that I had someone to confide in. She just sat there, smiling a knowing smile.

* * *

Phew, that was longer then expected. The extra was actually a later chapter, but it made more sense here. So as we know: Companion fic one: Belakraine ( inspired by my swim team goofing around with lesbian jokes), Companion fic two: Sort of RuPru and really angsty ( why Ivan and Gilbert are jerks/dickwads), Companion fic three: ? ( first one to get it right gets a oneshot, any pairing, any topic, any rating. )


	8. Chapter 7 Matthew: Where is my Hero?

Hello, my friends! I am back again with a super epic awesome chapter in which I get to put 'ze awesome Prussia! (kesesese)'

***This is a time skip of three months!***

Blah... My stomach hurts! My dad and I just had a huge breakfast of pancakes and maple syrup, while making fun of Canadian accents. Like father, like daughter, eh? I can't believe it, two chapters in a weekend? Enjoy!

-Stitched

* * *

I stared at the photo in my hand. It was slightly crumpled, from sitting in my pocket. I closed my locker softly, and leaned back on it.

In the picture, Alfred wore all black, and I had styled his hair into a mohawk. It made him looked older, cooler, and hotter. I had even managed to get that annoying little cowlick to stop popping up.

In the photo, he was absolutely stunning, and his sky blue eyes gleamed behind his glasses. It didn't matter how he looked- hell, he could be a cross dresser like Feliks for all I care- I would always be attracted to those eyes. The drew me in like a moth to a flame, and I didn't care if I got burned. We hung out more and more after that day, but one question remained.

Why hadn't he taken off his shirt?

I blushed, still looking a the photo in my hand. Did I want to see him shirtless, what would he look like?

I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that I didn't see the angry albino until to late. He cleared his throat.

"You are so annoying, you know zhat?" I just gaped at him.

"Honestly, get away from mein frued's locker!" He said, shoving me to the ground.

"What the hell is this all aboot, eh?"

I accidentally let my accent slip, something that ha gotten me nothing but trouble before.

"Oh so mister laune zeigen decided to to grow some balls, and decided to step up his act? Let's see how much it hurts when I rip them off?"

I was already on the floor, so the German easily kicked me in the gut. I whimpered slightly.

"Why?"

"Because, we don't need Alfred harmed by a demon." he replied coolly.

It all fit into place. Alfred was popular, these were his friends. I was standing in front of his locker. They felt threatened by me, and they were angry. Where was Alfred now? Why couldn't he be my knight in shining armor, my hero?

A tan boy, about my age came up and whispered in my ear.

"Nadie le gustas, así que puedes ir rot en el infierno." He got up again, and walked away, while the German stood smirking next to me.

An Italian teen ran up, going to ask the albino a question, but when he saw me he stopped.

"You filthy piece of shit, why are-a you even here?" he snarled. I winced. He looked like he was going to leave too, but he hesitated, a sadistic grin falling into place. He whipped back around, kicking me in the head. I slumped over so that now I was laying on my side, and closed my eyes. The bell signaling the start of the first class rang, and the two had walked away, completely nonchalant.

Maybe they were right, maybe I don't deserve to live. I felt tears prick the corners of my eyes. Nobody cared.

I heard running, but I didn't have the strength to look up. My head and stomach were sticky with blood, and I almost couldn't breathe.

"Oh dear god, Mattie! Wake up! It's Alfred! Please Matthew! Don't pass out... I'm so sorry I didn't get here sooner..."

With hearing those words, I blacked out, not caring what Alfred said. I was already hurt and bleeding. He couldn't save me from that fate.

* * *

German-

Mein frued- my friend

Laune zeigen- freak show

Spanish-

Nadie le gustas, así que puedes ir rot en el infierno- Nobody likes you, so you should go rot in hell.

* * *

The contest- I think the pairing will officially be put in around chapter 15(?). It has not been mentioned yet, but you will meet the second person soon. (you already know the first). It is based off a quote in a famous movie. Pm/review with the quote, movie, and pairing, and you will win. Movie hint: Morocco.


	9. Chapter 8 Alfred: You'll Be in My Heart

Ugh, this took forever to write, but that's probably because I was home sick with a bad cold/cough. I hate being sick. Contest: closed. Nobody replied! So the Oneshot will go to ChocoVanille, the only one who responded. Whoop-dee-do. Yay. You guys all suck. Don't get offended, this is always what I'm like when I'm sick. Pairing, Movie, and quote will be reviled in chapter 15, I think. I don't own Hetalia, Advil, or Tarzan.

-Stitched

* * *

I scooped Matthew up bridal style, mentally thanking myself for being super strong. I ran as quickly as I could out of the school, and the ten blocks to my house. I was gasping for breath as I fumbled to get the door open. My main concern was for Mattie.

I set him down on my living room couch and quickly fished my cellphone out of my pocket, hitting my father's speed dial. I briefed him on the situation and he rushed home as soon as possible.

It was around dinner time when he woke up. I awkwardly patted his back as he coughed. When he stopped hacking, he clutched his forehead, which had a giant band aid plastered to it.

"W-what happened?"

That's what we'd like to know." My father said as he walked out of the kitchen. He was holding glass of water and Advil, which he gave to the boy sitting on the couch.

"I remember three guys, one had white hair, one kept cursing, and the other was Spanish. I was standing by my locker when the first one started to yell at me. The told me that I was a freak, that I was stupid, and nobody cared about me. The told me that they wanted me to die."

A single tear rolled down his check before he quickly brushed it away. By the description, Gilbert, Lovino, and Antonio had beaten him up. And I had called them my 'friends'.

My father sat down in the arm chair across from where Matthew sat.

"Well, we were just going to order some pizza, you're more then welcome to stay the night."

Matthew called his father to let him know what happened, that he was okay, and where he was. My dad ordered dinner and he and Matt chatted idly throughout the meal. I sat silently, nibbling on a single slice of pizza. Occasionally, Matthew or Dad would send me a worried look, as if I were the one who had been knocked unconscious for eleven hours. Matt actually asked me if I was feeling alright, but I dismissed him with a nod of my head.

We sat around watching TV for awhile, before we got ready for bed. It was to early for sleeping, so we eventually wandered back downstairs, and plopped back down on the sofa.

I flipped channels until finally settling on the animated Tarzan movie. Every so often, I would glance to see how my 'patient' was faring. He leaned his head on my shoulder, exhausted from the day's activities. I felt a drop of dampness on my sleeve as the song 'You'll Be in My Heart' started. I pulled him closer and he gladly snuggled up to me. He was shivering, but that was to be expected, as he was wearing only a pair of boxers.

My dad came in shortly after that, tell us that he would be going to bed soon because he had to get up at four am to leave for a meeting. I couldn't see it at the time, but he was smiling. Not even twenty minutes later, I had a sleeping Canadian in my arms.

I watched the remainder of the movie, and when it was over I picked Matthew up the same way I had hours ago, and trudged up to my room. I softly laid him down on my bed. I climbed in next to him, spooning. As I pulled the covers over us, I kissed the nape of his neck and hummed the tune that had made him cry.

* * *

Come stop your crying

It will be alright

Just take my hand

Hold it tight

I will protect you

From all around you

I will be here

Don't you cry

For one so small,

You seem so strong

My arms will hold you,

Keep you safe and warm

This bond between us

Can't be broken

I will be here

Don't you cry

'Cause you'll be in my heart

Yes, you'll be in my heart

From this day on

Now and forever more

You'll be in my heart

No matter what they say

You'll be here in my heart, always


	10. Chapter 9 Matthew: You're Cute

I'm so tiredddddd. Okay, so I've been waiting to type this up because I've had a shit load of tests recently. Pffff, I was procrastinating, but really, there's been a crazy amount of quizzes, tests, and homework, almost like the teachers think that we have no lives, and all we do is homework! I'm falling asleep cause I had a swim meet, hurt my shoulder, and took medicine that has annoying side effects. Gonna update before I pass out. The summaries for the other stories in the series are up, if you wanna check 'em out. ;3

-Stitched

PS : The song "Here Comes the Rain Again" by Eurythemics was my inspiration. Please Listen!

* * *

I woke up the next morning with no remembrance of the previous day's activaties. I woke up warm, and for some reason I felt quite safe.

I blinked groggily, trying to sit up. Something, no someone, was holding me down. I went stiff with fear as the person pulled me closer to him. I could smell him, it was a fruity scent, familiar somehow. I tried to turn to see his face, but he had removed my glasses. I touched his arm around my bare torso, and suddenly I felt like I was punched in the stomach.

Yesterday's events came back to me in a blink of an eye. So technically, I had been punched in the gut, or at least kicked. 'Then the arm must belong to...'

Suddenly a pair of lips were pressed against the nape of my neck."Mmmhh, Mattie..." The barely awake American said, nuzzling my neck.

"Alfred?"

He yawned, snuggling into me. I hadn't noticed before, but we were spooning. The last thing I remembered was watching a movie with Alfred, so how did we end up like this? I glanced to the clock, it was only 5:00. I wiggled around and tried to get him to wake up. Not like I didn't want to stay like this, but Alfred might flip if he sees himself spooning the 'devil'.

I poked his cheek, which made him grumble. I almost giggled. Almost.

"Shuddup Dad, I was having a good dream."

I used a fake British accent. "About what, love?"

"Not what, who..."

By that time I was fully turned around, our faces only inches apart. Alfred cuddled back up to me, his head on my chest. He was positioned so that his ear was against my rapidly beating heart.

A few seconds later, he woke up, still in the same place. Clearing his throght, he asked how long I'd been up. I looked back at the clock.

"Twenty minutes."

He got up awkwardly, handing me my glasses and shoving his own on his face. I looked down at my lap after I had moved to sit on the side of the bed. We sat in silence until Alfred broke the tension.

"Let's get ready form school, we have to tell somebody about what happened to you."

I moved to get ready.

"I want this whole sleeping together thing forgotten, 'Kay dude?"

My heart broke at these words, but I moved to get ready nonetheless. He lent me some clothes, which made me feel utterly ridiculous. When he saw my expression he cracked up.

"Matt, it's not the end of the world, you look awesome." He clapped me on the shoulder and I winced slightly he start to worry about if I should even go to school today. I shoved him out the door, immediately regretting it. I'm a stupid passive-aggressive Canadian. Whatever, what's done was done.

I came out ten minutes later in all black. I had found a black Beatles t-shirt shoved in the corner of his drawer, I guess his father bought it, but it looked brand new.

He stared at me before walking into his room. I descended the stairs and when I reached the bottom I heard the door to his room close. He had been watching me.

I brushed it off as he was simply concerned about me and started making pancakes for breakfast, it was the least I could do for him.

After a big meal of pancakes, maple syrup, and coffee, we headed out on his bike. I sat on the handlebar as Alfred pedaled quickly to school. It was only 7:00, according to my watch. I was comfortable, despite the metal that was under me. His shirt was made of soft cotton, it smelled like him, though he'd never worn it. I was listening to his iPod as the wind buffeted my hair. A single curl blew from behind my ear, bobbing and swaying in the wind.

When we arrived at school I handed him back his iPod, and started to tuck the strand of hair behind my ear. Alfred stopped my hand.

"It looks cute." he said after a minute. It was accompanied by a smile, and a squeeze of my hand. He then linked our fingers together, and we walked slowly to Ms Braginskya's classroom.

Alfred knocked on the closed door and was called inside by our math teacher. He explained an abridged version to her, and I heard a harsher female voice ask a question. Alfred told them I was outside and could provide them with the details.

I was beckoned into the classroom, and woman who I had heard before was introduced as Natalya, who was apparently was married to the Ukrainian woman who was busy fretting over me. I explained exactly what happened.

Ms Braginskya bawled, eventually flopping back into her rolling chair, pushing it back a few feet. Natalya and Alfred comforted her as I stood back in a state of confusion.

"I'm sorry, she gets over emotional sometimes." Natalya looked at me sympathetically as her wife continued to wail.

"Oh Matvey, I feel so bad for you, I wish I could have stopped it! I'll give them all detention, but it already happened, and they always skip anyway!"

I went over to the sobbing adult, and tried to calm her.

"Ms Braginskya, it's fine. I'm fine, see? Alfred took care of me and I feel better."

She made me promise to get checked by the nurse, but we finally got her to stop crying. When she stopped crying, she tapped Alfred on the shoulder and whispered something in his ear. He went completely red, and for the third time this morning, I was confused.

* * *

Motherly Ukraine was fun to write, but this story is writing it's self now. I originally had the idea for gothxcutter, bulling, and angst. But I didn't know that we would meet Natalya, or that there would be so much fluff. I swear people, only one more fluffy-filler left, from here on in it's Hurt/Comfort :)


	11. Chapter 10 Alfred: Failure and Pride

Ohmahgod, my life is turning into a hurt/comfort story! Long story short, my friend told my crush that I like him, I /cried/ panicked, my friends helped me (thanks guys :3 ), and my enemy had a change of heart and he told him it wasn't true. Yay! And now since I'm in happy mood I will add more fluff. Have fun~!

-Stitched

* * *

Natalya slipped out of the classroom just before the first people filter into first period. Ms Braginskya wrote Matthew a pass, and he would most likely miss the entire lesson. Matt walked to the nurse just as the late bell rang.

"Okay class, we have a test today, I hope you studied. Binders away, take out a pen or pencil, you know the procedure."

I visibly paled, and my teacher shot me a worried look. I did as instructed while Antonio handed out our papers. I glared at him and he shied away after giving me my test. I figured out about half of them before my mind drew a blank.

I had discovered that I had quite a photographic mind. If I studied the night before, I would remember every last detail. However, last night was filled with taking care of Matthew. Not that I minded. I told him to forget about sleeping together because I had no clue what he was thinking. What if thought I was a creep?

I heard Ms Braginskya tell us that we had five minutes left for the test. I scribbled some wildly absurd answers down- ones that I knew would make me fail. I didn't know what I was doing.

As I handed in my test, Ms Braginskya looked over my answers. I saw remorse flash in her eyes, and I knew she thought I was going through a relapse. But that wasn't it. I felt guilt. I had failed my test. I had failed my dad. I had failed Ms Braginskya. Most importantly, I had failed Mattie.

The bell rang and I sprinted towards the bathroom. I sat in a stall, and pushed up my sleeves. Pain clouded my vision as I raked my nails down my forearm. I began to dig my nails into my skin just as I heard the bell for second period ring. I had done enough damage to myself in the short time in the bathroom. Matt had been medically excused from the test, and would be taking it next week. I walked with him to our shared English class and sighed, wondering if he would forgive me for disappointing him.

XxX

At lunch I sat with Mattie's friends, Feliks and Toris. Feliks said that they "were like, so totally happy" to have me sitting with them. Then Ludwig, Feliciano, and Kiku - who happened to be my first friends - came to sit with us. Mattie and I explained what happened to him, while Feli and Ludwig sat shocked. The soon snapped out of it and apologized for there respective brothers. Matthew told them it was okay, but he shouldn't have brushed it off so quickly.

XxX

I cornered the group known as "The Bad Touch Trio" after school. I would be meeting Matthew in twenty minutes to go to the movies with him. Because that's what friends who are boys do. Not boyfriends.

"Hallo Alfred! What's up?" The cocky German called, before seeing my face.

I walked up to him, roughly shoving him backwards. "Why the hell did you beat Matthew up?" I pinned him up against the wall.

"I-I was doing y-you a favor, j-ja?" The self-proclaimed Prussian choked out.

"Never lay a finger on my Mattie again." I let him go, and he slid to the ground.

"Your Mattie? What are you, homo?"

I turned and walked away.

"Schnitzer Saugnapf!" I heard him yell.

XxX

Mattie sat close to me in the movie theater. It was air conditioned, even though it was only March. We snuggled close and I pushed the test out of my mind. I just wanted to enjoy the moment. Every so often, my happiness would be invaded by a single remark.

"What are you, homo?"

Yes, yes I am. And I'm proud of it.

* * *

Was that last bit fluffy enough? WARNING: Major fluff next chapter! :)

* * *

Schnitzer Saugnapf- German for "dick sucker"


	12. Chapter 11 Matthew: The Rain is Falling

Ugh, last chappie had SO MANY typos D: Here, have a wonderfully fluffy chapter *throws a computer* To clear up any confusion, Matt gets beaten up on a Thursday, last chapter was Friday, today/this chapter & rest of story is Saturday.  
BTW-This story will be shorter then I thought, only two more chapters left! There were a lot of boring fillers which I scrapped. (Hi it's Syrus07. I'm on a bus!) Syrus stole my iPod, and I typed this on the way to swim team. We're on a bus! *insert meme face here*

-Stitched

* * *

I was laying in my bed, wishing for the comfort of Alfred's arms around me. That was a wonderful way to wake up. I would see him again today, it was about time that our parents met. I think that Papa would like Mr Kirkland. Alfred planned to bring them into my room. Our nurse, who happened to be a friend of Ms Braginskya, told me that I should avoid stress, because I was going to need stitches for the cut on my torso. Ms Héderváry got me an appointment for the stitches tomorrow.

At 12 o'clock, Alfred and his father walked into my room. The Brit greeted me and asked how I was feeling and I explained about going to the hospital tomorrow. Now we were just waiting for my dad.

Alfred flopped down onto my bed where I was sitting. I fell backwards, and Al laid down. I replayed the moments of yesterday morning for the thousandth time in my head. I could tell he was thinking about yesterday because he cleared his throat and looked away. All of a sudden we heard footsteps and a squeal from Arthur. Alfred's father squealing should not be possible.

But there he was, being picked up and spun around by my own father. Alfred and I sat up, our mouths agape. Then Papa kissed him, full on the lips. Arthur giggled; then he realized where he was. He straightened his tie and looked away embarrassed.

Alfred looked at them with an uncharacteristic scowl on his face.  
"Care to explain?" He asked his father.

"Well, Matthew's father and I went to the same college, and we dated. Then Francis met his wife and dumped me for her. We stayed friends for years, until Madeline had Matthew."

I looked to my papa, silently asking of it was true.

"Oui, that is what happened. Though I think that we never stopped loving each other."

I felt as if my heart was being ripped out of my chest. If our parents still loved each other does that mean Al and I... are brothers?

From the look on Alfred's face I could tell he was shocked. That shock soon turned into rage. He stormed out of the room and slammed my door shut behind him. The fathers shared a worried look before they asked me to follow him.

I ran out to the hall, my feet matching the pitter-patter of rain that had just begun to fall. I found the teen curled up on my couch, muttering darkly and frowning so much that I thought his face would break. I couldn't understand what he was saying, but I caught the words "stupid fairy fucking old men" and "why is my father such a flaming faggot?"

I felt my blood boil as he continued to mutter. He hadn't noticed me yet. That was about to change.

"Alfred, get the fuck out off my house." It was barely above a whisper, but he still heard me.

"What?"

"I said to get the fuck out of my house!" I yelled. I heard the quest talking from upstairs stop. I walked over to Alfred and roughly yanked him to his feet by the collar of his shirt.

"You think you can trash talk our parents just because they're gay? Let me tell you something, Mr Hotshot, I'm gay. Your best friend is a fag. Does that offend you?"

At this point I was shaking with rage, but Alfred just stood there.

"Get out."

I let him go, and he bolted out the door. I felt wetness on my cheek. Soon enough, I was on the ground, sobbing. The rain got harder and harder, and fell in time with my tears.

* * *

I lied, not fluff. Anyway, fourth companion fic: We'll Always Have Paris. FrUk. Based on line from Casablanca (worst movie ever, best quote ever). I will explain Katyusha and Elizabeta's friendship in "And She Hit 'Send'"


	13. Chapter 12 Alfred: Suicidal

Anybody else see the random "quest" that I typed last chapter? Yeah... typo. Um, I'm trying to get the rest of the story out so I can start working on the BelaKraine.

-Stitched

* * *

I ran out the door to my house, tears pricking the corners of my eyes. Matthew hates me. The only person, male or female that I actually harbored romantic feelings for, hates me. I hadn't meant any offense to my dad and Mattie's papa, but if they were in love... That means I would love my brother. That's incest, which is most definitely illegal.

I ran towards my house, fumbling with the spare key that was under the doormat. When I finally got the door open, I went to the kitchen, pulled out a pen and paper, and hastily scribbled a note to whoever would find this first.

Reaching for a drawer to my left, I yanked it open, revealing the shiny metal blades inside. Taking a deep breath, I removed a knife, and remembered back to the night before I had met Matthew. Life had been meaningless before then, I had just been floating from day to day, not caring. But after that one day, I had a purpose. I wanted to make the boy happy, I wanted to hear him laugh, wanted to see him smile.

I had made him hate me. He screamed, even cursed at me. The hatred and pain in his eyes was obvious. I had hurt him.

The knife in my hand clattered to the floor. Grabbing it up again, I looked around. Laughing hollowly, I suppressed the urge to use the cutting tool right then and there. I pocketed it, and walked calmly to the garage door. The silence and darkness of the empty house was eerie. At every little noise I jumped and gripped the handle of the knife inside of my bomber jacket pocket.

The door squeaked slightly as I pushed it open with my shoulder, causing me to tighten my hold on the object stowed in the coat. I started to wheel my expensive mountain bike out from under a pile of old lawn chairs. I hit the button to open the garage door and mounted the bike, pedaling into the heavy downpour.

I rode for about four or five blocks before the bike skidded on the wet pavement. I landed on the side with the knife, feeling the knife tear through the fabric pocket and bite into my skin. The first drops of blood were drawn on the dirty street.

I picked myself up, not bothering with the bicycle. I held the bloody knife to my chest and ran the rest of the way to the park where I had discovered my love for my Canadian friend. I scowled a bit as I pushed my wet hair back away from my face.

As I entered the forest, I thought about what I was going to do. Was Matthew really worth killing myself for? Of course he was. He was the only friend I ever had. I loved him. He wants me dead. He said he was invisible, but now that's what I wanted to be. Fade away. Never been born.

I found the clearing and selected a tree to prop myself up on. Before sitting down to die- funny, I never thought my life would end like this. I thought I would die old in a hospital bed- I took the knife out and hacked into the tree. After ten minutes of laborious work "AFJ + MW" could be read. Five minutes more, and a heart could be seen around the letters.

Thirty minutes after Matthew confessed his hate for me, I began to cut. Deep horizontal red stripes appeared under the sticky blade. Sap from the carving mixed with the warm red substance pooling from my veins. The clearing was filled with the scent of metallic blood, sweet sap, and clean rain. I watched the sky as I bled my life out by my left wrist.

* * *

Cliffhangerrrrrrr~! Yea, I know you love me. I won't be posting another chapter until um... Wednesday? I have a bar mitzvah to go to tomorrow, then a pasta party for swim on Sunday, then a swim meet Monday, typing Tuesday. One more to go!


	14. Chapter 13 Matthew: Dreaming of You

Hi guys, this is the last chapter. Honestly, it's been a journey. I think I've gotten better while writing this. Special thanks to:

-ChocoVanille

-spiritualnekohime4

-Hatsu Haruko

For sticking through no matter how boring the story got, and to:

-the5th alice of humansacrafice

-RussiaxPrussia4ever

-Miss Bloodrose

For probably reading this in one sitting ( which I appreciate ).

The Belakraine is going up in a week or two. And now *drumroll* each story will have a confession from me in the last chapter. Remember chapter 10 where Alfred failed the quiz? That entire scene happened to me; scratching included. But I swear on my life that's the only thing in this story that that I did, and I will never do it again. Please enjoy the somewhat happy ending 3

-Stitched

* * *

I finally got up from the floor and wiped the tears from my eyes. That bastard wasn't worth crying for. I went to the bathroom to wash my face with cold water. I looked at my self in the mirror. Wow, I looked like shit. The two men upstairs began talking again, albeit softer then before. I walked back to my living room to sit down and wait for when he came back to apologize. This was like any other fight.

Twenty minutes later I realized this was not a normal fight. Alfred hadn't come back yet. Calling to my papa, I said I was going to go talk to Al. I was kind of annoyed at this point.

I walked the four blocks to Alfred's house, shielded from the rain only by an umbrella. I had forgotten a coat in the hast to find the boy. As I approached the house, something felt off. I jogged up to the porch and saw the front door was open. There was definitely something wrong.

Leaving the wet umbrella by the door, I patted my pocket to make sure I had my phone. When I called out to him, my only response was the rain coming down harder. I started to search the entire house, every single room, for Alfred. Ending up in the kitchen, I spotted a piece of paper on the counter.

"To whomever is reading this," the note started,"I hope you had fond memories of me,"

Only the fondest. But why was this written in pass tense?

"I need you to tell my father it wasn't his fault,"

For what?

"It was my 'Friends' - Gilbert, Antonio, and Lovino. Tell Mattie that I didn't mean it. He'll know what I'm talking about. I'm sorry that I made him hate me. Also tell him that I love him and will always love him- especially when he think I'm not there for him,"

Alfred said to me about a month ago that he would always be there for me. I felt a giddy sensation at the words "I love him", but I was still perplexed.

"Life wouldn't be the same without him, so I guess since nobody likes me, I don't need it. All my stuff can go to Matt, and what he doesn't want, he can donate or something."

It was signed "Alfred F Jones" in loopy cursive at the bottom. Where was he? What does this mean?

Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted an open drawer. Peeking into it, I saw it was filled with an assortment of sharp knives. Looking back to the note, something clicked in my brain.

I was horrified, Alfred killed himself over me. I thought about it for a second. He couldn't have gone that far, and if he did, he might not be dead yet. I had to find him.

I started to run down the surrounding streets, having mixed emotions about the lack of people today. If somebody had seen him, that would have been great, but it would be hard to run through cars, since Al lived near a busy street.

I came to a halt as I saw a bike laying in the street. I had seen it in Alfred's garage, buried under a mound of stuff. The rain was coming down really hard now, and I was soaked to the bone. I in a hurry, but inspected the bike. The water droplets in some places were tinted slightly pink, and near by was a shred of fabric, the same color as the teen's favorite jacket.

It was wet and a bit sticky when I picked the scrap up, and smelled strongly of blood. Blanching, I looked away and continued to run. I followed a feeling, turning left, right, then left again, until I reached the park. I kept thinking positive thoughts until I entered the familiar forest from three months ago.

My cut on my stomach was bleeding again, and I had a stitch in my side, but I persevered in my search for Alfred. I finally found the clearing after what seemed like hours of searching.

Alfred was sitting on the ground, his wrist bleeding profusely. I ran to him, with tears in my eyes. His eyes were half open, kind of glazed over.

"Mattie..." He whispered pointing up to the tree weakly. I saw what he had been pointing to. "I love you." He stated softly. I enveloped him in a hug. "Love you too." I mumbled, now crying. I hesitantly pulled away, whipping out my cell phone. I silently thanked myself for saving up for a water proof case.

"911, speaking how can we help you?"

"My boyfriend just tried to commit suicide." I briefed the woman on our location. I didn't care that I referred to Alfred as my boyfriend, and I doubt he did either. That was fine by me. As soon as we got out of this mess, we would start dating.

When the ambulance came, Alfred was put on a stretcher because he was to weak to move. I sat next to his head and absentmindedly stroked his wet dirty blonde hair.

A medic climbed in the back and we started to drive to the hospital. The brunette doctor turned to me.

"You're lucky you found him so quickly, another five minutes he would have been dead."

I nodded in acknowledgment and glanced at Alfred's newly bandaged wrist. His arms were covered with scars, both knew and old. He would go to a Psychiatric Ward for a while, but I would be able to see him. For that I was glad.

His eyelashes brushed against his cheeks as his eyes closed. He looked tired.

"Shhh, every thing will be okay."I promised him, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

I had been lied to, but I knew more then most did about this wonderful man. He kept me protected and told me secrets. Life had been like a wonderful dream.

* * *

Okay, so the place between a truth and a lie is a dream, get the title? I hope you enjoyed the story!

PS- I am going on a field trip to the Bronx Zoo on Thursday the 25, if you see a blonde middle schooler in a black hetalia shirt, that's me. If you see me, wave!


End file.
